Every Movement Starts With a Chain Reaction
MY STORY / TESTIMONY
After spending most of my childhood up to adulthood in a downward spiral of severe anxiety and depression, living a life full debilitating panic attacks anger and isolation, I wrote my self off.... There was no way I would ever get to live a normal life. I would never have a family of my own, go on a date, drive a car, or get to experience a real life. My entire life was plagued by these mental struggles. The anxiety was so bad many days it made me physically sick...often times it felt like I had the flu.
After 10+ years living like that I grew very tired. Many times I tried to give up, but something inside of me always held on, I guess I just thought I would be better off suffering than to put that burden on those around me.
Eventually God sent someone into my life that changed everything. This person was a believer who slowly poured light into me. Over the course of a few more years my life began to slowly transform. But it wasn't until after ONE defining moment when Gods presence came over me during one of my worst panic attacks, that I realized I was not in this battle alone anymore. (Before this I never really believed, my life was one big ball of negativity and I thought if there was a real God why am I this way? It just didn't make sense to me) I did not grow up in a church or really know anything about Jesus or God.
After this defining moment I was able to completely come off all medications within 2-3 months and overcome all my mental limitations. I was taking about 4-7 pills a day just to "kind of cope".
Let me share that moment with you..... (leading up)
After I met my wife, she helped me face challenges and experience life like I hadn't before... but the battle was only halfway through, she became my crutch, I was dependent on her and my medication to survive. I was still heavily medicated and scared to death my 2 daughters would see the real me, I was afraid they would model my worry and anxiety, I was afraid I would set them down the same course that I was still on. Unfortunately It takes time to change 10+ years of bad habits and negative ways of thinking... to this day I still battle a few of those habits.
The Moment That Changed Everything
After my second daughter was born we picked up a cleaning Job for extra income. It was my first day and I had to go in to be trained. On the way there I went into full blown panic attack (medication wasn't stopping this one!) it got hard to breath... my limbs were going numb. Sometimes it felt like I lost touch with reality. My brain was spinning and my stomach churning. Panic attacks can literally make you feel like you are going to die.
I arrived about 30 min early... This attack was so strong I for sure thought I was going to pass-out and miss work. I opened the car door to lean out and vomit. The flu like symptoms began to set in, my stomach was cramping so bad I felt nauseous and fatigued... despair was setting in.
Just then I glanced in the review mirror and saw our church... The office we were cleaning was about 3 buildings down on the same side of the road. At this point I had been going to church for about 3 to 4 years but still wasn't sure if God was real. I didn't grow up religious or really know much about God or Jesus. But for those 3 to 4 Years every Sunday I would watch all those people and question what propelled them, why were they like this, what was it all about? I watched them sing and praise, worship and display faith. I saw how kind and positive they were. I questioned it all, I was intrigued. I have never been around so many genuinely good people before.
Back to the moment - After glancing at the church, I remembered all those people I had been watching so I put my head down and prayed a real prayer for the first time in my life. I had nothing to lose so why not give it a shot. It went something like this "Jesus... God... If you are real... please show me a sign, I can't do this alone anymore. I can't go on like this. This anxiety will get me killed. God please work in my life, help me, I can't do this anymore (as thoughts of rock bottom flooded my mind again) I need you, I don't want to be a burden to my family anymore." I took a deep breath and looked up. It was a cloudy day and I could see spots between the clouds where beams of light were shining through. In the moment that I looked up, all my panic and anxious feelings evaporated. I was overwhelmed with a warm sensation. So strong it literally brought me to tears and a smile. I felt free for the very first time in my life. I stepped out of the car a new man. I stepped out of that car a believer. At that moment I new God was real... Never in my life was I able to walk out of a panic attack like that... but that was just the beginning. That moment was the tipping point of a transformation in my life.
Our mission is to not let others go 10 to 15 years in the darkness like I did before finding a light in my life. My goal is to share my story, testimony and lots of content in hopes to inspire and help lift others out of the darkness. I want to create a brand and community.... a movement, that spreads positivity, hope, kindness and love. A community that strives to be a light in this dark world. Eventually I will create a place where we can all chat, hangout and inspire one another. People need people and together we can help motivate one another to be the best version of ourselves and have a positive impact in this world.
Our vision is to position this brand as a beacon of hope, positivity & love. A constant reminder to shine bright and speak life in other peoples lives. What you say and do carries great significance whether you realize it or not. We want to create a force of light and be a constant reminder to one another to shine bright in this dark world... If God would not have sent someone to be a light into my life, I would not be here today....